August, 2009

Photographic Memories – Oldest Son Goes Back to College

Last week, my youngest daughter moved away from home to start her Sophomore year at college and ripped my heart out.

Today, my oldest son ended his summer visit and left home to begin his Junior year in college and stomped what was left of my heart into little squishy pieces.

What a week! He went to college right out of high school for a year, went to Cambodia for 2 years as a missionary, came back and finished his Sophomore year at college and came home this summer for 4 months.

Having everyone home for the summer one last time was a treat for all of us. I’m so glad we had this time together. (cue Carol Burnett)

It’s funny to watch the big changes in life as they come at you screaming at the top of their lungs. The 2 of them leaving for college within a week of each other signals a major shift in our lives and our family dynamic will never be the same.

I’m not saying it’s a bad “thing”, it’s clearly not. We’re thrilled our kids are heading out, growing up, setting goals and making plans. It’s just a different “thing”, a different stage.

Now we’re preparing to downsize out of our “dream home,” the home we raised all 5 of our kids in.

We only have 2 left at home and it’s just too big of a house for our needs. It’s been a great home in a wonderful neighborhood, with neighbors that are more like family members.

This has been one of the most difficult decisions we’ve had to make in our lives. Kids leaving home, starting a couple new businesses, continuing the old photography business, packing, de-cluttering, I’m exhausted just writing it all down.

Clearly, we have a lot on our plates at the moment and the emotions my wife and I are feeling are all over the board.

As part of the overall “clean up” I was going through countless boxes of transparencies from my 24 year career. Many of my best selling images over the years have been shots of my kids. One minute I’m helping my 22 year old son pack workout stuff, a guitar, design and art supplies and the next minute I’m looking at pictures of him when he was 4 years old playing basketball.

The beauty of photographs is the crispness of the memories they actually preserve. As I look at all these pictures of him tracing his growth from a baby to young man I can clearly remember so much of the events surrounding those images.

I can remember the stores we went to together shopping for props or wardrobe. I can remember the bribes I occasionally had to use to get some shots. I can remember almost complete conversations we had at the time.

I’m so glad we have all these photographs to remember all of our family’s adventures together.

My wife and I have quite a few friends that are in their 20′s and 30′s, starting their own little families and I’m envious of them. I would love to have another chance to document and make art out of a family’s journey together.

I guess that’s why I’m so excited about the Photo Mommies Workshop. It’ll give me a chance to help others get the same amount of joy that I’ve received over the years taking pictures of our kids.

There’s nothing quite as cool as catching that “perfect” moment with your baby or toddler or teenager. That shot that captures who they really are, you know, when you just nail it and can look at it forever.

Today’s technology makes it easier than ever to capture these moments. When our kids were little, we used film cameras and that got so expensive. The digital age has changed the entire landscape of family pictures.

Once you have a camera and a computer it doesn’t cost you a dime to shoot. Take advantage of that.

Shoot your kids like crazy. Take it from me, they don’t stay little forever. You may have a 2 year old today, but you’re going to blink one day and they will be driving off in a fully loaded car to another state, going away to college.

You’ll be so happy and excited for them, and yet at the same time it’ll be breaking your heart. The ultimate “bittersweet.”

I’ve written enough. Now I have to go and look through more of my “old school” transparencies and stroll through memory lane with my kids.

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Online Photo Workshop – I Want to Shoot My Family | Photo Mommies - [...] wife and I are at a point in our lives when our kids are moving out of the house. It’s very bittersweet. We’re excited to see our kids growing up and moving off to [...]

Daughter Heads to College – Photo Memories

Courtney © Tim Pannell Photography

I just finished cleaning my 19 year old daughter’s bedroom. She left for college on Sunday morning. I’m one sad daddy.

We packed up all her stuff she needed into our minivan and her little car and she and my wife drove off on Sunday morning.

I can’t walk into a room without seeing a photograph of her………it’s brutal.

She’s our 3rd child to leave the nest. We have 2 more at home, thankfully.

It’s a stupid and corny old cliche, but they do grow up so fast.

I remember the day she was born like it was yesterday. She was either screaming at the top of her lungs or content beyond belief, either – or, hot or cold, no in between.

She was such a teeny little thing. The first time you hold that tiny baby in your hands…….as a dad, all you want to do is make her happy and keep her safe. You’d do anything for her. I always wonder if any of our kids really understand that.

I look back at all my mom had to go through raising my 2 sisters and me and I was appreciative of it then as a kid, but I didn’t have a true grasp of all she was going through at the time.

I remember her first day of school, first day at Disneyland first cheerleading tryouts, first date, prom, graduation, first day of college.

She did her first year of prereqs at the community college last year. She’s now going 700 miles away to start on her dental hygienist program.

“Mixed emotions” doesn’t come close to explaining how I feel. I’m excited for her to be on her own and get a taste of the real world, but I’m gonna miss her more than she’ll understand.

She’s not the first to leave home.

Our oldest daughter is “special needs”, (I hate that term) she lives in a group home a few miles away with a girlfriend of hers. It’s a great house and she has a ball there, she was bored out of her mind at home with us. She comes home on the weekends and hangs out with us, anything longer than that and she gets a little antsy.

Our oldest son got a year and a half of college in, served as a missionary in Cambodia for 2 years and went back to college. He’s been home for the summer and heads back up to school in just a few days.

It was hard letting him go too, but at the risk of sounding sexist (sorry) it’s different with my daughter. There’s an altogether different dynamic and connection. I can’t really explain it. I miss her already.

I know she’s going to do great and be extremely successful at whatever she does in life. She’s very self motivated and once she decides she wants to do something, she is tenacious at accomplishing it. I’m very proud of her.

I look at the pictures we have of her around the house and I’m grateful for all those memories we have.

I love our family! I wonder where the next 10 years will take us.

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Online Photo Workshop – I Want to Shoot My Family | Photo Mommies - [...] of the house. It’s very bittersweet. We’re excited to see our kids growing up and moving off to college to take on the world, but there’s a rather large piece of us that yearns for those days, not [...]

Show More: child photography • photographing children • photography tips • photo memories

Disneyland 12 Step Program

Disneyland Merry Go Round © Tim Pannell Photography

Hello, my name is Tim Pannell and I’m a Disneyland addict. I have been Disneyland free since March 8th 2009.

Ok, I’m a big Harley Davidson biker looking dude, but inside, I’m a sentimental puddle of goo. “Don’t judge me by my looks or my emotions!”

I’ve spent more money, spent more time, driven more miles going to and from Disneyland and carried more sleeping kids from one end of the park to the far end of the parking garage than any other person I know. I need a 12 step program I think to bring me back to reality.

Actually , I think that program exists and it’s called the “economy.”

I love Disneyland! I remember as a 5 year old thinking it was the most amazing place in the world. It was my Shangri La. I loved the buildings on main street. I loved the colors. I loved the smells. I loved the music. I loved the Safari ride. I loved Dumbo! I loved everything about it.

Mostly I loved being with my family.

I have my own family now and my wife and I have been married for 27 years as of Thursday, this week. We’ve known each other since I was 12 years old and she was 10. We have 5 kids and we’ve been taking them regularly to Disneyland at least once a year since my 22 year old son was 4 yrs. old.

The last 6 years, we had annual passes and have gone as much as 5 times a year. Yeah, I know, we’re sick puppies and I should grow up.

I’ll never grow up………I am Peter Pan!

We’ve had so many fun times at Disneyland on family vacations and we’ve taken a lot of pictures there over the years. One of the biggest photographic problems I had at Disneyland was me always trying to get a “GREAT” shot instead of just getting “a” shot.

We solved that dilemma by getting me a little “happy snap” camera. That let me just shoot without feeling like I had to get a professional quality shot all the time.

The shots still look good because I know how to compose a strong image and I recognize good light and how to use my backgrounds right. “Wow, goody for you Tim…………..photo dork!”

The secret to taking photos at Disneyland is to not get carried away to the point where you’re cheesing everybody off, making them stop every 15 feet to get a picture.

Everybody’s trying to get to Splash or Space Mountain as fast as possible and every time you make them stop to take a picture, you’re letting about a billion more people ahead of you in that line. CRAP!

Truth be told, its usually my wife that wants us to stop and take a picture and I’m too busy being the “move your butts” drill sergeant dodging and weaving my way through the bus loads of people that are genetically predisposed to form a group therapy session right in front of the lines to get into “Indie.” Where do these people come from?

In any case our Disneyland days are probably behind us, at least until some of our kids start popping out some of their own kids. We look at it like it’s our 10 year Disney hiatus. We’ll miss it, but now, with the kids being older there’s a lot of other things we want to do.

Fortunately, we have a ton of memories and buckets of photos to remind us of all those great times we spent together at the park. The funny thing though is that sometimes it takes seeing all of those photographs to remind us of the “memories.”

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